The suggestion that we all have been subject to this idea of self-esteem as a recovery from subconsciously feeling abandoned, aloof, or distant from our Heavenly Parents is very intriguing. It may or may not explain perhaps the reason why so many people are born the way they are being “naturally” quiet, distant, recluse, and aloof from the behavioral patterns many other people share. I reflected on how I was when I was little. I was this very way. Now, however, I have learned to come out of my shell a bit more, yet my character has never really changed dramatically to the effect that I am never or no longer quiet as I once was. I admit, I have my moments of doing just that quite often.
She shared an astounding fact that if I had learned, I must have forgotten altogether in which it is that being children of our Heavenly Father, no matter who we are or what our circumstances, we’re His children and as such we inherit a piece of divinity. Be it talents, true kindness within our hearts, knowledge, attributes, light, etc. we have it within ourselves the essence of godliness. This blessing within us that the scriptures also refers to as the Light of Christ and that the world refers to as our “conscience,” is the divine blessing within us that causes the bitterness of sin - AMAZING!
We are direct heirs to Heavenly Father’s kingdom and all the blessings He possesses and with which He wishes to bless us. It’s an amazing thing to rediscover and learn that builds my character, sense of belonging, and knowing such will influence my actions in the future. I hope I can also teach others this knowledge later in life when the time comes. I wish I knew to teach this on the mission because I am sure that there are very few people in the world that actually know that and it can change their behavior quite a bit too, I’m sure.
I loved her analogy found in King Benjamin’s talk about putting off the “natural” man as a recovery to regain our sense of our pre-mortal selves in the pre-existence. It makes me think still about what I must have been like in the pre-existence. I mean, of course we are who we were in the pre-existence and it influences our behavior here on earth as well, but I mean to say the earthly ways of the world such as these feelings of guilt, inadequacy, and so forth that impede me from further being the better self I was in the pre-existence. It makes me reflect on what I once was and how much better I can be still yet to come.
She taught of pursuing the path of charity and humility rather than trying to build up our own character and the means she took to describe the feelings found in both and their results was fabulous as well. I have found that is exactly what happens when I try to make myself feel better about myself and the difference it is when compared to when I try to make others happy. Such a case was on the mission. Honestly the best two years of my life and anyone else who faithfully served a mission well. We’re serving others full-time. The rest of our lives seems to be devoted mostly to ourselves and we end up feeling miserable. Something obviously needs to change, I feel. On top of it, when she adds much later on the way the Savior behaved here on earth not seeking riches, power, or anything prideful or arrogant of the sort, He came to serve others and it’s the only thing He ever did. Another amazing thing to have to remember.
My perception has changed much on the concept of understanding what self-esteem really is. I admit, I still will turn my mind to the old habit of thinking of what it once was to my mind, but nevertheless I’m sure that after more class discussion on the matter soon enough, it will be instilled upon my mind and heart to know what it is to better help others understand it as well. In these past couple of months, I have reflected a great deal on my previous idea of what was my “self-esteem,” and this article has inspired me to reflect further and better on the subject in ways I hadn’t contemplated before. I look forward to shedding from myself my pride and in all ways, shapes, or forms my “natural man” to be able to rightfully declare again what - or in a better word - who I once was and who I can better be. Me.
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